Every month, Damien Belmont gets a brown box in the mail from the Richard L. Roudebush VA Medical Center. Then, a friendly reminder pops up on his phone: “TAKE YOUR SHOT.”
The 41-year-old from the south side started transitioning years ago. He has the routine down on Friday nights: Take his testosterone, then go out to meet friends or dance.
“I’m the happiest I’ve ever been,” Belmont said. “Even though I’m the scaredest I’ve ever been.”
The fear is greater now than when he served in the U.S. Air Force from 2006 to 2008 during the “don’t ask, don’t tell” years when LGBTQ+ service members were forced to hide. Now, more than a decade after that policy was repealed, he is at risk of losing the health care he fought for.
“I’m terrified they are going to take my hormones away and I just don’t know if I could live,” Belmont said. “People do not see me as human or deserving of a happy life, but I’m not hurting anybody.”
He is among an estimated 134,000 transgender veterans across the country living in uncertainty after President Donald Trump ordered the federal government to recognize only “two biological sexes” and to end programs that “promote gender ideology.”
The Indiana VA started reacting to the order this month, two employees told Mirror Indy, including removing gender-neutral bathrooms and requiring staff to erase pronouns from their email signatures and documents. Many fear the next thing to be eliminated will be a VA clinic that provides gender-affirming care.
“We’re just waiting for when they close the clinic,” said one of the employees, both of whom are not being named by Mirror Indy because they are not authorized to speak and fear retaliation.
Mark Turney, a spokesperson for the Richard L. Roudebush VA Medical Center, said he did not know how access to gender-affirming care in Indianapolis would be affected by the president’s order. He previously said the hospital is waiting for guidance from the U.S. Department of Veterans Affairs.
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A spokesperson for the U.S. Department of Veteran Affairs did not answer Mirror Indy’s questions about gender-affirming care as of Monday afternoon. In a statement on Jan. 31, a spokesperson said the department has 120 days to “fully, faithfully and thoughtfully execute” Trump’s order.
Benefits and services at the VA won’t change until a formal order from the VA’s Office of the Secretary, the spokesperson said.
The lack of clarity on gender-affirming care access has increased anxiety in Indianapolis.
One local veteran updated his health records to remove information about his transition and pronouns, fearing it could fall into the wrong hands. Mirror Indy is not naming him because he is not publicly out and fears retaliation.
“I’m worried right now if Elon Musk or any of his cronies go in and find a button they can push that pulls up every veteran with this flag on their profile,” the veteran said. “I don’t want to be a target.”
‘Cruel and deadly’
The military is one of the largest employers of transgender people, who appear to be twice as likely to serve than the general population, according to a national survey published in 2020.
The VA health care system has been providing some forms of gender-affirming care to veterans since 2011 and recently expanded health benefits to people who were discharged based on their gender identity or sexual orientation.
Gender-affirming care, which can include surgery and hormones, helps people transition when their sex assigned at birth does not match their gender identity. It is supported by virtually every major health care organization and can reduce suicide, depression and anxiety.
“Cutting off these lifelines is cruel and deadly,” said Lindsay Church, the executive director of the Seattle-based nonprofit Minority Veterans of America. “It’s not ‘if’ at this point, it’s when.”
Church, who is nonbinary and transgender, served in the U.S. Navy. They are set to testify about gender-affirming care before the U.S. House and U.S. Senate committees on veterans’ affairs this week.
“De-transitioning just sounds, honestly, like a nightmare … I know who I am.”
— Damien Belmont, U.S. Air Force veteran
While transgender veterans are still able to access their care, Church believes the policies will change — and they recommended looking for health care outside the VA.
“Transgender veterans should make every preparation they can,” Church said.
Josie Caballero, the vice president of the Washington, D.C.,-based Transgender American Veterans Association, said veterans in Indiana should report any changes to their medical care to the organization.
“When the policy is implemented, we will sue,” she said. “Right now, we keep telling trans veterans to get their care until they tell you no.”
That’s what Damien Belmont did last week when he went to see his endocrinologist at the Indiana VA. Growing up, he always knew his body didn’t match who he was. Transitioning saved his life.
“I have three suicide attempts,” Belmont said. “I am so grateful they failed so I could live long enough to be on this other side of my story.”
During the appointment, he learned his hormones are safe, for now. The next Friday night, he can go out dancing and still be himself.
Mirror Indy reporter Mary Claire Molloy covers health. Reach her at 317-721-7648 or email maryclaire.molloy@mirrorindy.org. Follow her on X @mcmolloy7.
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